Ed month 3

Ed sat on the couch watching crappy reality TV waiting for something to happen. He really should be cleaning for Audrey...but that would mean getting up, so there goes THAT plan. He could really go for some food right now, but that would also mean getting up. Sometimes, it stunk to be lazy. "Hey Doorman, get me some food, wouldja?" He asked. The Doorman looked up at him. You're kidding, right? Ed sighed. "You are one useless dog." The Doorman yawned. And you are one useless human. Even though he didn't speak dog, Ed always knew what the Doorman was thinking. He chuckled, guessing his response. "Okay, you got me there." Ed jumped three feet in the air when the phone rang.. "Uh, hello?" He said in surprise. "This is Ed." "Yeah, NOW you answer your phone!!" Ed sighed. "Hi, ma. Why are you calling me right now?" This was two times in two months. Impressive. "So what, NOW I'm not allowed to CALL YOU! You talk to me like THAT and you expect me NOT to be MAD!!! YOU are one SORRY child, Ed." "Ma, I really don't need this right now. I was busy cleaning for Audrey." he lied. "Oh, sure, cleaning for Audrey." she countered in an obnoxious, sing songy voice. "Like you care enough to get off your LAZY BUTT to clean your own house for you friend who's coming ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE WORLD TO SEE YOU!!!" She was really screaming at the end. "Ma, I'm hanging up now." he said, trying to reason with her. "OKAY, FINE! GO RIGHT AH-" but he hung up before she could finish. But two seconds later the phone rang again. He whipped the phone up. "WHAT!" he yelled. "Yeah, this is your boss." Ed groaned. "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Then he checked the time and groaned again. He was 15 minutes late for his shift, as his boss soon reminded him. "Yes sir, I'm coming. I'm so sorry." He grabbed his coat and ran outside as fast as his lazy legs could carry him.